Me: I know you aren’t in the best of moods.
Nell: I am not.
Me: But I had to take you to see Alex yesterday.
Me: You needed your ear drops.
Nell: I didn’t need the shame of a public weigh in.
Me: The scales are in reception.
Nell: I didn’t need my weight discussed by all and sundry. Including a rather large Pyrenean Mountain Dog who had no business getting involved.
Me: I agree. The nurse thought you looked a little slimmer.
Nell: Do you know what it’s like to have David being Marvellous all the time and showered with treats and Harriet eating like a horse and staying slim and petite?
Me: I sort of do know, Nell, as my sisters could always eat what they liked and I never could.
Nell: I am who I am.
Me: I know and I wouldn’t change anything about you. We all love you, Nell. Would you like a pot of Earl Grey by the fire?
Nell: That would be kind. And a soft blanket, perhaps?
Me: Of course. I’ll ask Harriet to bring you the latest Good Housekeeping.
Nell: And just a few of Poppy’s shortbread biscuits?
Me: You are not supposed to have those.
Nell: I understand. Shortbread is reserved for the young and marvellous.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: At least Meghan sounded happy when she called from Australia. They gave her a kangaroo for the royal baby, you know.
Me: I’m not sure it will settle over here, Nell. Although we used to have wallabies on the Isle of Wight.
Nell: It’s a soft toy. Good grief.
Me: Yes. Sorry.