Nell: Would someone please get Gladys out of the hamper. She has her head in the Stilton.
Me: You wouldn’t let her sleep in your handbag.
Nell: Rita is already in there. Why has Ron Gilbert got a moustache?
Me: The Cat painted it on him while he was asleep.
Nell: Well, Mutley’s fifteenth birthday party is one we shall never forget.
Me: The highlight has to be Mutley singing “My Way” on top of the piano.
Nell: Yes. It’s amazing what a swing band and a bowl of jam roly poly can do.
Me: What about Poppy doing a sword dance?
Nell: Accompanied by John on the bagpipes. Their kilts were the genuine article you know.
Me: When those Frenchies started dancing flamenco I couldn’t believe my eyes.
Nell: Yes. I never knew bulldogs could be so light on their paws.
Me: Harriet and Jim sang beautifully. She has such a sweet voice.
Nell: I’m not sure we needed Rita and Gladys dancing around them with roses in their teeth.
Me: And Dave’s performance? Spectacular.
Nell: Words fail me. Where did he get those stilts from and the trapeze?
Me: And how did The Cat get in the cake?
Nell: I’ve no idea but when it jumped out at midnight I thought that elderly Airedale in the corner was going to have a heart attack.
Me: It was very impressive. Mutley loved it all.
Nell: And we love Mutley.
Me: Talking of love. Did I see you smoochy dancing with Charlie?
Nell: Smoochy dancing? Go and wish Mutley a Happy Birthday again from us all and leave my love life to me.
Me: Yes. Sorry.