Me: Nell, I want to talk to you about Labrador deafness.
Nell: Sorry?
Me: About how you sometimes don’t seem to hear me.
Nell: What did you say?
Me: It’s not funny, Nell. Dave has started doing it now too.
Nell: I was only just saying to Harriet that we need to work on our retrieving skills.
Me: I asked you a question and you’ve ignored me.
Nell: Sometimes the ball just floats past us in the sea.
Me: It’s so annoying.
Nell: Yes, it is because you have to swim around to find it.
Me: You heard me then.
Nell: Of course I did.
Me: Why didn’t you hear me before?
Nell: And David just doesn’t get the retrieving thing at all yet.
Me: He waded into the sea quite far when you two girls missed the ball.
Nell: Yes, that’s true. David did well that day.
Me: But when I call him he doesn’t hear me. It’s a selective deafness if you ask me. Don’t you agree?
Nell: Sorry?
Me: You are doing it again, Nell.
Nell: Did you say something?
Me: I give up.
Nell: Anyway, I think the answer to the retrieving problem is more time on the beach.
Me: Whatever.
Nell: We could go now then.
Me: Fine.
Nell: Good, I will tell the others
Me: You heard me well enough then, no sign of deafness.
Nell: Sorry?
Me: I don’t believe it.
Nell: Did you say something?
Me: Let’s just go now.
Nell: Excellent idea. David! Harriet! You heard what she said. Beach time!