Me: You know how Dave likes to watch Saturday Kitchen with me?
Nell: Yes. He looks forward to it all week.
Me: I didn’t expect him to get into the bed.
Nell: You shouldn’t have been in bed.
Me: It’s Saturday. I’m allowed.
Nell: So is he.
Me: You don’t expect a great big paw on your shoulder.
Nell: David likes to be close. He’s a tactile animal.
Me: He’s awfully heavy.
Nell: Never mind that, I have something much more important to tell you.
Me: We’re not having green soup for breakfast again, are we?
Nell: No. It’s boiled eggs and soldiers and Poppy is making a quiche for lunch.
Me: Thank goodness. Is the llama feeling better?
Nell: Yes. Knitwear Wolf has managed to organise a knitted jumpsuit to go under its pyjamas.
Me: That’s a relief. So, what’s the big news?
Nell: You are not going to believe this.
Me: I just might.
Nell: My friend Pamela called Book a Beefy a few days ago to order herself a luxurious dog bed from Fifi la Beefy.
Me: That’s not exactly big news.
Nell: There’s more.
Me: Was it too small? She’s a Pyrenean Mountain Dog so she will need Extra Large.
Nell: Guess who delivered it.
Nell: No. Squawk.
Me: Squawk? I thought Sally had him locked away in a safe place.
Nell: So did I.
Me: Did he deliver it nicely?
Nell: Of course, he didn’t. He threw it over the gate and it ripped open.
Me: How dreadfully rude.
Nell: That’s when she saw the bed was stuffed with fleece.
Me: Nothing wrong with that.
Nell: Llama fleece.
Me: She wanted luxurious.
Nell: There is a naked llama in our field who might have something to say about this.
Me: Oh yes. Sorry.