Nell: Is David watching the Bus Stop?

Me: Yes. Rumour has it that a Tupperware of Spaghetti Carbonara might be on its way.

Nell: Is Carbonara made with bacon?

Me: Yes, with guanciale, parmesan and eggs but no cream according to the Italians.

Nell: Guanciale?

Me: Salt-cured meat.

Nell: Bacon.

Me: Sort of.

Nell: Poppy makes hers with pancetta and pecorino.

Me: If you know what Spaghetti Carbonara is, why did you ask?

Nell: Recipes vary a great deal and Poppy’s bound to ask me what you’re eating today.

Me: I hope there’s enough spaghetti to go around.

Nell: There won’t be if David gets there first.

Me: Maybe I should go over to the Bus Stop with him?

Nell: Maybe you should. The Weather Guardians say temperatures are dropping soon so pasta is just the thing.

Me: There’s something rather lovely about Autumn.

Nell: Is there?

Me: Eating bowls of pasta and snuggling up in your favourite blanket with a dog and a book in front of an open fire is perfectly acceptable.

Nell: It’s always acceptable. Talking of blankets, is Rupert still in Canada?

Me: Yes, Knitwear Wolf spent Canadian Thanksgiving with his wolf family.

Nell: I hope he doesn’t decide to stay there.

Me: I don’t think he will.

Nell: What if Mark Carney needs him?

Me: We all need him, Nell. He’s family.

Nell: I’ll be glad when he’s back.

Me: So will we.

Nell: How’s your sister Charlotte?

Me: She’s doing a little better. Thank goodness. It’s been such a worrying time.

Nell: All the more reason to rest and recuperate.

Me: I think I can see Stanley Smoochy walking towards the Bus Stop with a Tupperware container.

Nell: Then stop talking to me and go and get it before David does.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: Can you see them?

Nell: David and Harriet? Yes, of course I can see them. They’re in the stream.

Me: No, the Cow Spies.

Nell: Cow Spies?

Me: One of them isn’t doing a very good job. She’s blatantly spying from the middle of a field.

Nell: Are you absolutely sure the cows are spying?

Me: Look at them all hiding in the bushes. It’s obvious.

Nell: Isn’t spying supposed to not be obvious?

Me: Only to the untrained eye.

Nell: And you think you have a trained eye?

Me: Yes. I spotted them immediately.

Nell: Is it possible they were just enjoying a little shade?

Me: No. When we lived in Oxfordshire I didn’t trust the horses but down here in Devon it’s the cows.

Nell: I know I’ve told you this before, but sometimes you have far too much imagination for your own good.

Me: I’m not imagining anything. It’s true.

Nell: Moving on, did Alice have a good birthday?

Me: She did. I had a lovely time in the evening texting with Alice and Andre and Chris and Shannon trying to think of names for the baby.

Nell: What was your suggestion?

Me: Bear.

Nell: Bear?

Me: Why not? Do you think the cows might be in league with the Beefies?

Nell: I think they might just be cows wondering what all the kerfuffle is about?

Me: What kerfuffle?

Nell: Scuffing leaves can make quite a noise.

Me: How did you know I was scuffing leaves?

Nell: It’s autumn and it’s what you always do at this time of year. It brings back memories of being a child and scuffing leaves with your mother and sisters.

Me: You’re right.

Nell: I listen to you when you tell me things and I remember. Everything.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: That’s me with Alice.

Me: I know. I love that photo of you both.

Nell: So do I. This is a special day for you, isn’t it?

Me: Yes. At 7:14am 42 years ago in a big, scary hospital in West Berlin I welcomed my first born into the world. My wonderful daughter Alice.

Nell: A life-changing moment.

Me: Yes. I remember staring down at her little face hardly able to believe she was mine. She was the most perfect thing I had ever seen.

Nell: I can imagine.

Me: Before I forget, it’s also Thanksgiving Day in Canada so Happy Thanksgiving to all my Canadian family and friends .

Nell: And the same from me. I’ve written Alice a poem. Would you like to hear it?

Me: Very much.

Nell: ‘I’ll say it right now,

As I know you will, too.

How can Alice

Be forty-two?

Not only that,

But goodness me,

Next year she’s expecting

Baby number three.

Exciting times are ahead

Full of happiness and joy

As soon we will welcome

Another wonderful boy.

A little brother for Faye

And Jonathan Sky.

Granny’s so happy 

She’s started to cry.

Stop that right now. 

It’s Alice’s birthday. 

And she must be celebrated

In every possible way.

With cake and candles,

And party hats,

And lots of dogs,

And definitely no cats.’

‘But Alice loves cats.

They have to be there.’

‘Fine, only a few.

Now, pull up a chair.

It’s time to sing

In a loud sort of way, 

Happy Birthday dear Alice

Have a wonderful day.’

Me: She’s going to love it. Thank you.

Nell: My pleasure. I know you miss her very much and wish you were there.

Me: I do. I hope she knows how much she is loved.

Nell: She knows.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: Nigel looks deep in thought.

Me: The responsibility of caring for someone you love who is unwell is a heavy one.

Nell: How is Charlotte?

Me: Extremely tired, of course, but insisting on going home later.

Nell: Oh dear.

Me: I’d rather keep her here longer.

Nell: Hopefully she will take it easy.

Me: I’ve told her to. Whether she listens is another matter.

Nell: Maybe Sunday Songs will help? Singing is good for the soul.

Me: Do you have Sunday Songs up there?

Nell: Of course. Poppy insists on singing sea shanties more often than I’d like but it’s still enjoyable.

Me: I like to think of all you Guardians singing away.

Nell: Will the llamas be dancing?

Me: Yes, on roller skates.

Nell: Good grief. Did Nigel go to the pub with Kev?

Me: He did. It’s their special time together.

Nell: Was that aggressive pug around?

Me: No. Thank goodness. Talking of pugs, can you Guardians fly?

Nell: I beg your pardon.

Me: Do your wings work?

Nell: What are you talking about?

Me: Don’t you have wings?

Nell: I’m a Labrador, not a flamingo.

Me: Don’t worry. Nobody could ever confuse you with a flamingo, Nell.

Nell: Well, stop all this wings nonsense, please.

Me: Do you remember the flamingo who flew to France around this time last year? It was called Frankie, wasn’t it?

Nell: Yes. Can we get back to today? Make sure Charlotte and Nigel don’t leave until they’ve eaten a good Sunday roast.

Me: I will.

Nell: Roast beef, roast potatoes, carrots and parsnips, fresh vegetables and Yorkshire puddings with lots of gravy should do the trick.

Me: Herr Hoffmann is peeling potatoes as we speak.

Nell: And no horseradish.

Me: But Charlotte loves it.

Nell: Not anymore.

Me: No. Sorry.

Nell: I’m glad to see Nigel is with you.

Me: Yes. He’s had a difficult week caring for Charlotte so I think he’s relieved to be here. Poor chap.

Nell: What is David doing?

Me: He’s catching up on The Great British Bake Off. He missed it last week.

Nell: Nigel still looks worried.

Me: He is.

Nell: How is Charlotte?

Me: She’s completely exhausted but doing a little better.

Nell: That’s very good to hear. Do we know any more about what happened?

Me: We do and it’s actually good news. The doctors now think the chest pains are oesophageal spasms which feel like a heart attack.

Nell: So, it isn’t her heart?

Me: No, but it’s very painful. She has to take morphine to cope with it.

Nell: No wonder she’s tired.

Me: Yes, but I’m so relieved it isn’t her heart. There was a time when I really thought I was going to lose her.

Nell: I know.

Me: She has to be very careful what she eats and drinks as it’s easily exacerbated by certain foods.

Nell: Plain food is probably best.

Me: Yes, we’re having chicken and rice today.

Nell: A sensible decision. Have you seen her this morning?

Me: No. She’s still sleeping.

Nell: Why are you up early again? It’s Saturday.

Me: I’m too wound up to sleep, Nell. I think my pocketful of happiness is that it’s not Charlotte’s heart.

Nell: I think you’re right. Did the Welsh Corgi Choir sing?

Me: Yes, they did. Just a gentle lullaby to help her sleep.

Nell: Which one?

Me: ‘Too‐Ra‐Loo‐Ra‐Loo‐Ral’. It’s an Irish lullaby our mother used to sing to us.

Nell: And Bing Crosby.

Me: No, just our mother. Bing Crosby’s a film star.

Nell: Who sang it.

Me: Oh, I see. Sorry.

Nell: How is everyone?

Me: We had a quiet day yesterday. No hospitals and lots of cuddles.

Nell: How is Charlotte?

Me: Extremely tired. She says she feels like she’s been hit by a bus.

Nell: Is she still in pain?

Me: On and off. She’s having to take morphine to help her cope with it.

Nell: Morphine can make you feel very sick.

Me: Yes, Kev is going to collect some anti-sickness tablets for her today.

Nell: What a worrying time this is.

Me: She and Nigel are coming to us for the weekend so I’ve been busy getting her room ready with fresh bedding and towels.

Nell: Good.

Me: I think she’ll need comfort food.

Nell: I agree.

Me: Herr Hoffmann is making a casserole with lots of vegetables and mashed potatoes.

Nell: Mashed potatoes are always comforting.

Me: They are. The Welsh Corgi Choir are going to be singing.

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: Just a few lullabies under her window to help her sleep.

Nell: Good grief.

Me: I think she’ll like it.

Nell: Just keep the llamas away, please.

Me: I will. They wanted to perform an Encouraging Dance but I said it was too soon.

Nell: Thank Heavens for that. I can’t think of anything worse.

Me: It was quite a slow dance, Nell, with scarves and ribbons.

Nell: It’ll be the Dance of the Seven Veils all over again.

Me: Yes, they got a little tangled. Although it might make her laugh.

Nell: I don’t think she’s in a laughing mood at the moment.

Me: Maybe not.

Nell: Keep things as quiet and calm as you can.

Me: I will.

Nell: Cups of tea, gentle chats, hugs when needed and only a few tears. I know what you’re like.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: You all look extremely tired.

Me: We had another difficult day, Nell.

Nell: What happened?

Me: Kev and I had to take Charlotte back into hospital with chest pains.

Nell: Oh no.

Me: She was feeling really tired and unwell and the hospital said she’d better come in for further tests to rule out a heart attack.

Nell: It must have been scary.

Me: It was. She was so weak. It broke my heart to see her like that.

Nell: I’m sure it did.

Me: After hours of waiting and further tests they are now ruling out angina, but aren’t sure what it is.

Nell: Was she discharged?

Me: Yes. She didn’t get home until around 1am, but at least she’s home.

Nell: Nigel must have been out of his mind with worry.

Me: Charlotte said he’s being a very good boy. He slept next to her all night and kept her safe.

Nell: And what about you?

Me: I’m chugging along, Nell.

Nell: You need to take care of yourself. You can’t help Charlotte if you’re exhausted.

Me: I know. Dave and Harriet are very worried. They’re not used to Kev and I being gone for so long.

Nell: Fortunately they have each other.

Me: Yes, and they gave us a wonderful welcome home..

Nell: Good dogs.

Me: I’d like to say a big thank you to everyone for their kind messages of support. Please keep Charlotte in your thoughts and prayers.

Nell: I’m sure they will. Now, what are your plans for today?

Me: Kev and I are hoping for a quiet day but you never know at the moment.

Nell: Best to take one day at a time. And remember I’m here to listen. You and me. Always.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: No sorries. Not today.

Nell: You’re rather late today and David looks exhausted.

Me: We’ve had a dreadful night, Nell.

Nell: Why? What happened?

Me: My niece called me yesterday evening to say they were rushing my sister Charlotte into hospital with chest pains.

Nell: Oh no.

Me: A&E was completely overrun and she had to lie across chairs.

Nell: How awful.

Me: She was in dreadful pain but they managed to get it under control.

Nell: Was it a heart attack?

Me: No. Thank goodness. It was severe angina. They sent her home around 4:30am and have referred her to the cardiac team.

Nell: You must have been worried out of your mind.

Me: I was. I managed to talk to her from 3am when the chest pains subsided which helped both of us.

Nell: Your poor sister. She must have been so frightened.

Me: She was but fortunately our wonderful NHS doctors and nurses came to her rescue.

Nell: You are lucky to have them.

Me: We are. I am so thankful.

Nell: This must have brought back memories of losing your little sister Alex.

Me: It did.

Nell: I think you should go back to bed.

Me: I will. I just wanted to let everyone know what happened.

Nell: How is Nigel coping?

Me: Better now, I imagine. He was at home alone with Xav the Cat. Charlotte was very worried about him so I told her Kev would drive over and collect him if she didn’t get home.

Nell: But she is home.

Me: Yes, and her daughter is with her.

Nell: There’s nothing more to be done at the moment so I would suggest you try and get some sleep.

Me: I will.

Nell: David and Harriet will watch over you.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Nell: No sorries. Not today.

Me: There’s something comforting about green fields, isn’t there?

Nell: Yes, there is. What are the farmers growing?

Me: We think they’re growing turnips for winter feed.

Nell: That makes sense.

Me: Yes. I always see green as the colour of hope.

Nell: Or Go.

Me: Go?

Nell: Red means Stop. Green means Go.

Me: Oh, yes. I see what you mean.

Nell: You’re up early today.

Me: I have an appointment first thing this morning for a mammogram.

Nell: Good.

Me: That’s what Kev said, although I’m always a bit nervous about these things.

Nell: You will be.

Me: And I imagine the worst.

Nell: Understandable. It’s very unlikely they will find anything but if they do then they will have caught it early.

Me: You’re right.

Nell: Which is why it’s so important to go to any screenings offered.

Me: Yes, it is.

Nell: So, your photos of green fields today are particularly apt.

Me: Why?

Nell: Green means Go and that’s what you should do.

Me: You’re right.

Nell: Just think of it as a Green sort of day.

Me: I’ll try.

Nell: And if you’re feeling nervous think of walking through those green fields with Dave and Harriet.

Me: We’re not actually allowed to walk through the fields. We have to stick to the path so we don’t damage the crops, although Harriet doesn’t always listen.

Nell: Good grief. Can we just agree that today is a positive day of hope and you’re doing the sensible and right thing?

Me: I’m still a bit scared about it, Nell.

Nell: I know, but you’re being brave.

Me: Not really. I’m a bit of a coward.

Nell: Being brave is facing something you’re scared of doing. Being scared is not cowardly at all. It’s human.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

Me: I’ve been thinking.

Nell: Here we go.

Me: About how lucky we are to have wonderful countryside walks on our doorstep.

Nell: You are.

Me: The light in the woodland yesterday was absolutely magical.

Nell: I can see that from your photos.

Me: The sun was really quite hot so it was lovely to have some shade.

Nell: The Weather Guardians tell me it’s unseasonably warm at the moment.

Me: There are several parts to our walk. We start and end in the woodland but in the middle we are out in the fields and it feels completely different.

Nell: It would do.

Me: The farmers were out on their tractors tilling and seeding the soil.

Nell: Good for them.

Me: I couldn’t be a farmer.

Nell: No you could not.

Me: They work so hard. From first thing in the morning to last thing at night or even into the night. We hear the tractors.

Nell: It’s a hard life.

Me: I couldn’t drive a tractor.

Nell: Nobody suggested you should.

Me: I have trouble reaching the pedals in a normal car.

Nell: I don’t think the pedals get further away the bigger the vehicle. Not all farmers are tall.

Me: Talking of farmers, Jim the Farm Dog paid Harriet a surprise visit and joined us for dinner.

Nell: The poor animal.

Me: Why do you say that? He was delighted to see Harriet and she was over the moon to see him. It was adorable.

Nell: After a hard day’s work in the fields Jim will have been expecting a Sunday roast with all the trimmings and all he got was a salad.

Me: It was a lovely salad with home cooked gammon and baby potatoes.

Nell: Salad is salad.

Me: Yes, I suppose it is. Sorry.