Me: Can I have a quick word with you, please?
Nell: It’ll have to be brief. I have a breakfast meeting at 8:30am.
Me: A breakfast meeting?
Nell: Yes. My friend Dorothy is joining me here, if you must know, for a smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel.
Me: How very American of her.
Nell: It’s being delivered.
Me: Really?
Nell: Yes. Babycakes Gillespie is trying out a new venture.
Me: I see. And you and Dorothy are the guinea pigs?
Nell: I beg your pardon? Dorothy is one of the Salcombe Setters and I am a pedigree Labrador.
Me: No. It’s just a saying. You and Dorothy are testing the waters.
Nell: Water? We’re expecting frothy cappuccinos and nothing less.
Me: But Babycakes Gillespie has been selling bagels and coffee from his cart for ages.
Nell: He’s branching out to a takeaway breakfast which can also be delivered to your place of work. He’s calling it Breakfast for the Busy.
Me: Breakfast on the hoof, so to speak.
Nell: Hoof? I’m not a llama, although they’re keen to try it. Apparently it’s just what they need after an early morning cartwheel.
Me: I’m not sure I’d call you busy. In fact you’ve been decidedly lazy recently.
Nell: Lazy? I’m rushed off my paws.
Me: You might be doing a lot of organising, Nell, but everyone has to come to you.
Nell: What’s wrong with that?
Me: You insisted on eating your salad on the sofa yesterday evening.
Nell: I was tired.
Me: There was lettuce everywhere.
Nell: I’m not a fan of lettuce. David usually eats it for me.
Me: Everyone else ate in the kitchen.
Nell: I needed my electric blanket.
Me: I know you’re getting older but I don’t think you should behave like a diva. Sorry.
