Tony is back again

Me: It was lovely to see Tony again, wasn’t it?

Nell: I told David not to jump up as Tony has bruised ribs and he still did.

Me: He can’t help himself. Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy. He loves Tony so much.

Nell: Fortunately Tony was prepared and managed to hold his paws.

Me: He didn’t mind at all.

Nell: I wish David would listen. He’s such an impulsive animal.

Me: Has there been any news on The Cat’s jewellery box yet?

Nell: There have been suspicious sightings.

Me: Of the box?

Nell: No. Several Beefies in sparkling hats were seen eating chips on the quay in Kingsbridge.

Me: The cheek of it.

Nell: And my friend Dorothy said a long haired Beefy in a sequinned caftan bought the last scotch egg at the delicatessen.

Me: How does a seagull even wear a caftan?

Nell: With difficulty. But that’s not the point.

Me: No.

Nell: The Cat is completely beside itself about tonight’s performance.

Me: You can’t have Strictly without sparkles.

Nell: I’m afraid it has had to resort to tin foil and glitter.

Me: That sounds a little uncomfortable.

Nell: One must expect to suffer in the pursuit of one’s dream.

Me: I suppose so. Tin foil is a little restrictive for dancing.

Nell: Count Bingo Flamingo says being wrapping in foil is making him feel like an oven ready turkey.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: All I can say is thank goodness for Henry and Horst.

Me: Why?

Nell: They’re going to sit on the contestants’ shoulders in their sequinned jackets to add a little sparkle.

Me: It will be a very little sparkle, Nell. They’re only woodlice.

Nell: Only woodlice? How dare you? Henry and Horst are beacons of hope in a dark world.

Me: Of course. Sorry.

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