It’s simply not happening

Nell: It’s too much, isn’t it?

Me: Well, I think it might be.

Nell: I told The Cat that hat was over the top even without the wig, but would it listen?

Me: Obviously not.

Nell: It said it loves the way the blonde hair frames my face.

Me: It’s dreadful, Nell.

Nell: I agree. It’s simply not happening. A few fresh roses in my summer hat are going to have to do for the Easter parade.

Me: Yes.

Nell: I’m leaving the wigs to David and Gladys. They love the things. You know that Beefy still flies around wearing David’s long black wig?

Me: What did Charlie say?

Nell: He hasn’t stopped laughing since he saw me and Mutley choked on his scrambled egg.

Me: You have no need for adornments. You are a classic beauty.

Nell: Kind of you to say so.

Me: It’s true.

Nell: There, I’ve taken it off.

Me: Much better. I couldn’t really have a serious conversation with you wearing that thing.

Nell: When do you have serious conversations?

Me: I’ve been known to.

Nell: Tell me that David didn’t just walk past carrying Gladys in my handbag and wearing my blonde wig?

Me: He did. I must say he can carry it off with style.

Nell: Is Gladys wearing that awful pink hat?

Me: I’m afraid so.

Nell: And does it actually suit her?

Me: Yes, it sort of does. Sorry.

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