Nell: I’m extremely annoyed with Kevin.
Me: Oh dear. You usually call him Kev.
Nell: Well, not today.
Me: What has he done?
Nell: He is in cahoots with David and Poppy. We were at the garden centre just now buying compost when he admitted he knew about the whole debacle.
Me: Where is Dave, by the way?
Nell: Exactly.
Me: Is he having a lie in?
Nell: David is training with the England team in Russia. He never came home.
Me: What?
Nell: Oh yes. Poppy left him there.
Me: No!
Nell: Apparently the team see him as a mascot. Pickford has taken him under his wing and David is training to be a goalie. He will be on the bench on Wednesday.
Me: Well, that’s ever so exciting for him.
Nell: He is a young and impressionable animal. He only just survived the seagull attack and the loss of his muffin.
Me: Surely Gareth will keep an eye on him.
Nell: He has promised me he will. At least Poppy is flying back for the semi finals and taking Mutley with her. He’s got a lunch meeting in Moscow so they can feed two puppies with one bone.
Me: Don’t you mean kill two birds with one stone?
Nell: No. Why on earth would I say that?
Me: Poppy has been baking all morning.
Nell: Yes. The team have requested scones.
Me: Do you think you should go too?
Nell: I’m not going to leave Harriet, now am I? Fortunately she and David are FaceTiming later. Thank goodness for Woof’s App.
Me: Are you letting her go to the beach barbecue with Jim?
Nell: I’m not sure she should be socialising with the farm dogs.
Me: It’s very Romeo and Juliet isn’t it? Poor star crossed lovers.
Nell: Do get a grip. Just fetch me my handbag. Gareth needs me to call him with Wednesday’s lineup.
Me: Ok. Sorry.