Me: You’re all looking rather serious this morning.
Nell: It’s early. We haven’t had breakfast yet. What are you doing downstairs?
Me: It’s my Wednesday Writers workshop soon so I thought we could have a little chat before then.
Nell: I can’t talk to anyone until I’ve had a cup of Earl Grey and some hot buttered toast with homemade marmalade.
Me: Was that a hint?
Nell: It was a polite request.
Me: There’s something about marmalade in the morning, isn’t there? I wouldn’t eat it at any other time of day.
Nell: Yes, it’s more of a morning food, although I wouldn’t say no to a marmalade sponge.
Me: With custard?
Nell: Of course. Sponge without custard is like a dog without a collar.
Me: I should really get you a new collar for Christmas. People keep thinking you’re a boy called Neil.
Nell: I quite like my boy’s collar. I’m used to it.
Me: You had a special collar for our publicity photos when the book came out.
Nell: Yes, I remember it well.
Me: It was pinky-purple with a matching lead.
Nell: It was. Dave ate it.
Me: Yes. Would you like another one?
Nell: Not really. He’ll only eat it again.
Me: He was very young then, Nell.
Nell: He still does it.
Me: It’s just excitement.
Nell: So, is there any chance of that toast and marmalade?
Me: Oh yes, I forgot.
Nell: You might as well make a pot of Earl Grey while you’re there.
Me: Which reminds me to say thank you to all of you who bought us a cup of Earl Grey. We’re very grateful.
Nell: I’d be grateful if you could stop talking and go and get my breakfast.
Me: Alright, Bossy Paws.
Nell: I beg your pardon?
Me: Sorry.
