David is in A Very Bad Mood

Me: I think Dave might actually be in a very bad mood.

Nell: He is.

Me: But he’s never in a bad mood. He has a sunny disposition.

Nell: Not today.

Me: Do you know what’s made him so grumpy?

Nell: I might do.

Me: Have I done something to upset him?

Nell: Have you?

Me: Not as far as I know.

Nell: Well then.

Me: Has Sunday Songs been rained off?

Nell: The Welsh Corgi Choir aren’t afraid of a little rain.

Me: Are we having salad instead of a Sunday roast?

Nell: Don’t be ridiculous. Sunday roasts are non negotiable.

Me: Well, what is it? Something must have upset him.

Nell: Sally has been sighted on Burgh Island.

Me: Sally, head of MI5 and the love of Dave’s life?

Nell: Yes.

Me: Golden Retriever Sally?

Nell: Yes, and David didn’t even know she was in the area.

Me: She’ll have a very good reason.

Nell: Of course she will.

Me: It won’t just have been a holiday.

Nell: I hope not.

Me: A little break away from everyone and everything.

Nell: No.

Me: Like a retreat.

Nell: Sally is not on a retreat.

Me: She might be.

Nell: She was seen having dinner with a lion.

Me: Dinner?

Nell: Yes.

Me: With a lion?

Nell: I just said that.

Me: Who saw her?

Nell: The Beefies. Stephen Seagull happened to mention it in his ‘thank you for a lovely afternoon tea’ text to David.

Me: Except it didn’t just happen. That nasty piece of work knew it would upset my darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: But what was Sally doing on the island?

Me: Having dinner with a lion. You just told me.

Nell: Why keep it a secret? Especially from David?

Me: I’ve no idea. Sorry.

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