Me: It’s lovely to have my sisters and Hattie Button here, isn’t it?
Nell: Yes, it’s delightful to have family visiting and to finally meet her at last. Shame we lost the football but we played well.
Me: You were all a bit boisterous at first. She was overwhelmed.
Nell: I’m afraid David doesn’t do restrained as you know.
Me: No. If he wasn’t my darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy I could be quite annoyed with him.
Nell: Hattie Button is a very well behaved young animal.
Me: Unlike some.
Nell: Whatever do you mean?
Me: I’m afraid we’re going to have to address the elephant in the room, Nell.
Nell: Please don’t tell me that elephant is lost again.
Me: What elephant?
Nell: The one who was separated from the herd.
Me: I have no idea what you’re talking about.
Nell: Got on the wrong plane. Ended up in Devon. It was all over the news.
Me: Not my news.
Nell: You should read the Daily Growl more thoroughly.
Me: Maybe I should.
Nell: What elephant are you talking about then?
Me: Hattie Button’s missing dinner and the theft of Foxy, her favourite toy.
Nell: David says he ate her dinner by mistake.
Me: He cleaned the bowl thoroughly.
Nell: A tidy bowl is a tidy mind. I’ve told you that before.
Me: It was unacceptable behaviour.
Nell: It wasn’t his finest hour.
Me: And then he stole Foxy.
Nell: He borrowed it for a while.
Me: Three times.
Nell: He gave it back.
Me: Only when I made him.
Nell: Moving on, Poppy says Sunday roast will be on the table at 2pm.
Me: Dave better not steal Hattie’s lunch.
Nell: It was a mistake. Let’s enjoy Sunday songs together and be thankful for family.
Me: Yes. Sorry.