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Dogs can’t climb trees

Me: What’s the matter with my Big Brave Beautiful Boy?

Nell: Beauregard is in Oliver’s tree house.

Me: Goodness me. Is Oliver ok with that?

Nell: He says Oliver invited him. But I’m not convinced. Does it sound likely to you?

Me: That a tiger would be in a tree house?

Nell: No. Tigers like trees. Everyone knows that.

Me: Not in Devon.

Nell: No, but is it likely that an opossum would invite a tiger into its house?

Me: Was it a particular invitation, or a general one?

Nell: I see what you mean. Oliver might have extended an invitation to us all to come and see the beautiful tree house that Rupert has made for him.

Me: Yes. And Beauregard was the only one who came.

Nell: To be fair we dogs can’t actually get up a tree.

Me: And once a tiger is up there then there isn’t an awful lot of room for anyone else.

Nell: Quite.

Me: Is that why Dave’s so sad?

Nell: Partly, and because a little birdy told him that Chris White-Mckinney is leaving the UK today to go and live with her husband Greg in Florida.

Me: Does Dave know Chris?

Nell: No, but she’s one of our loyal readers and David thinks she might forget us.

Me: I’m sure she won’t. We have lots of readers from all over the world.

Nell: That’s what I said.

Me: Was it Walter?

Nell: Was what Walter?

Me: The little birdy.

Nell: No it was James Beddall.

Me: He’s very caring.

Nell: He’s trying to turn us all vegetarian.

Me: You enjoy your vegetables.

Nell: Harriet is passionate about cauliflower.

Me: I know she is. Do you think I could get up a tree?

Nell: Please don’t. For so many reasons.

Me: Sorry.

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