Me: You all look exhausted.
Nell: We were consoling Knitwear Wolf until the early hours of the morning. All I can say is thank goodness for scones. David had to eat dozens.
Me: What happened?
Nell: You know Gladys and Alejandro borrowed Knitwear Wolf’s motorbike?
Me: Yes, to take Princess and Our Penguin for their daily swim.
Nell: That was what we were supposed to think.
Me: Didn’t they swim?
Nell: They did actually, because Princess said she couldn’t manage without one.
Me: Seals do need their sea time. What else did they do?
Nell: They went to see Myfanwy.
Me: That wasn’t an essential journey.
Nell: That’s not the point.
Me: No.
Nell: Actually, when questioned, they insisted it was essential to the support of Knitwear Wolf, so they did have a point.
Me: When questioned? By the police?
Nell: Fortunately PC Panda was on duty.
Me: What did they do?
Nell: They drove to Myfanwy’s house and shouted outside her window.
Me: What did they say? Heartbreaker?
Nell: No. Much worse.
Me: What?
Nell: Bad Dog.
Me: Bad Dog?
Nell: I know. I was shocked too.
Me: I only say ‘Bad Dog’ if I’m very angry.
Nell: To be fair they were very angry and justifiably so.
Me: So why did the police get involved?
Nell: Princess started singing ‘Bad Dog’ and then Alejandro took out his maracas and Gladys performed a contemporary dance.
Me: Goodness me.
Nell: People came out of their houses and joined in.
Me: Sounds fun.
Nell: It was an illegal gathering. Myfanwy called the police and they were escorted home.
Me: I wish I’d seen it.
Nell: You can. Our Penguin filmed it all and it’s trending on YouChewed. Knitwear Wolf is most unhappy. He is such a private wolf.
Me: Yes. Sorry.