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No cats in the kitchen

Nell: That’s me at the station yesterday.

Me: Yes. It’s a lovely photo.

Nell: I was letting Kev know that I would be there for him during this difficult time.

Me: I’m coming home tomorrow you know.

Nell: Yes. Anyway, we decided against lunch at the Garden Centre and drove straight home.

Me: Why?

Nell: We felt the twins needed us. David had three biscuits before he could even think of being marvellous and to be honest he was only mildly fabulous.

Me: What about Harriet?

Nell: Jim the Farm Dog came over with some flowers which cheered her up and then we had Malcolm’s fitting.

Me: For his winter jumper?

Nell: Yes. It’s more of a poncho if you ask me. No arms to speak of.

Me: Does he like it?

Nell: He loves it but The Cat is insisting on sequins.

Me: I don’t think Malcolm is the sequins type.

Nell: Poppy put a stop to it. She said there were to be no sequins in her kitchen and no cats.

Me: Gosh!

Nell: Well, that put the dog amongst the sheep I can tell you.

Me: Don’t you mean the cat amongst the pigeons?

Nell: No. Poppy said no cats. Sometimes I think you aren’t listening to me at all.

Me: What did The Cat say to that?

Nell: It flounced out. It didn’t even finish its crumpet and they were delicious. So what are you doing?

Me: I’m actually enjoying a rather nice breakfast before I go and join the others to go to the wedding.

Nell: Bacon and eggs no doubt. I know you go a little wild when you are away.

Me: You must tell Tony the postman that the eggs weren’t anywhere near as good as the ones from his chickens.

Nell: As I always say: “One cannot expect Devon eggs when one is not in Devon.”

Me: True.

Nell: Much as I would love to chat to you all day I must go as I have a whippet waiting.

Me: A whippet?

Nell: Yes. We are interviewing for the cafe. David can tap dance but his waiting skills leave much to be desired and those shoes make a dreadful noise.

Me: I see.

Nell: Now, go and get ready and give the bride and groom my love. Don’t forget your hanky as you know you get emotional.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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