Off gallivanting again?

Nell: Did I just hear you correctly?

Me: Yes. I’m going to Liv and Ben’s wedding in Essex.

Nell: The parents of little Lily?

Me: Yes.

Nell: Without me?

Me: It’s only for a few days.

Nell: How many more times are you going to go off gallivanting all over the country leaving me to deal with the chaos you leave behind?

Me: That’s a bit harsh, Nell.

Nell: David is inconsolable for a while after you leave.

Me: How long is a while?

Nell: At least two biscuits.

Me: Gosh.

Nell: He isn’t really marvellous until you come back.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: And Harriet just goes very quiet.

Me: Harriet is quiet.

Nell: This is a different kind of quiet. A sad, abandoned one. Fortunately she is busy knitting Malcolm a winter jumper.

Me: Yes.

Nell: Well, I suppose there is no point in dwelling on it. I shall ask Poppy and Malcolm to cook us all something really special like Swedish meatballs.

Me: But they are my favourite.

Nell: You should have thought of that before.

Me: I didn’t know about it before.

Nell: A lame excuse. You can’t go to a wedding and have Swedish meatballs. It’s either-or.

Me: What rubbish.

Nell: A little less attitude, please. Now do try and behave and make sure you wear layers.

Me: Yes.

Nell: I suppose Poppy could make you a small picnic again. A few scones and some sandwiches. Try not to share it with everyone in your carriage. Have you finished packing?

Me: Nearly.

Nell: I’ll organise some Earl Grey and a boiled egg and soldiers. You need a good breakfast before you leave.

Me: I will miss you all, Nell. You know I would take you with me if I could.

Nell: I know. Make sure you enjoy yourself and give the happy couple our love. I expect you suited and booted downstairs shortly so don’t dilly dally.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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