Sunset swimming

Nell: There is nothing like a swim at sunset.

Me: Yes. Look at little Harriet.

Nell: We all had a great deal of fun until the incident.

Me: Do you mean that angry border collie?

Nell: It was an Australian shepherd.

Me: No. It was definitely a dog, Nell.

Nell: Very funny.

Me: I’ve never seen Poppy so angry.

Nell: It was making sizeist remarks.

Me: What do you mean?

Nell: It said: “Will you look at that scruffy little thing with those labs. Thinks it’s a real dog.”

Me: Your Australian accent is ever so good.

Nell: Thank you. Anyway, when Poppy demanded an apology Paul Robinson started shouting.

Me: Paul Robinson? Are you sure that was his name?

Nell: Oh yes. He’s well known in the area. Very rich and owns a lot of land. Poppy shouted back because she can be fierce when provoked. Ask her kitchen staff.

Me: Do you mean Harriet as I didn’t know she had any kitchen staff?

Nell: No. Poppy has a whole team of terriers in her brigade. Do keep up.

Me: I never knew.

Nell: David heard her shouting and ran over. He is very protective. Just because someone is small doesn’t mean they are less. Harriet is a small lab, for instance.

Me: To be fair you are the same height as Harriet but you are curvier so you seem bigger.

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: In a good way.

Nell: David demanded that Paul Robinson should apologise, or face the consequences.

Me: Yes. I bet he used his big boy’s voice.

Nell: Please don’t say things like that. Big boy’s voice. Whatever next?

Me: Did Paul Robinson apologise?

Nell: No. He left the beach.

Me: Well, Dave certainly defended his family.

Nell: He is growing into a fine young dog. Best of all his retrieving skills are greatly improved.

Me: Marvellous.

Nell: I’ve told you not to say that. Now you have to hand out a treat.

Me: Sorry.

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