Me: You’re rather bossy this morning. Barking orders from the yellow chair.
Nell: You said there might be a viewing at lunchtime. I need to get everyone up and doing.
Me: The estate agents haven’t confirmed it yet.
Nell: Well, they’d better confirm it soon, or we’ll never get the house ready in time.
Me: I know.
Nell: There are animals everywhere.
Me: Nothing new there.
Nell: Did anyone say the llamas could join us for breakfast?
Me: It’s Saturday, Nell. We always have a shared breakfast.
Nell: I’m not sharing my bacon sandwich.
Me: Llamas are vegetarians. They’re having muesli.
Nell: Have you agreed to help David with his book?
Me: Of course I have.
Nell: That’s a relief, because he’ll never manage it on his own.
Me: Maybe the llamas can help with the vegetarian section?
Nell: I think not. Llamas aren’t skilled at making conversation. They prefer to keep active.
Me: Do they?
Nell: And if challenged they just fall over.
Me: Why would anyone challenge a llama?
Nell: Excessive cartwheeling can annoy even the most tolerant of animals.
Me: Meaning you.
Nell: Moving on, Nigel’s staying over tonight with Charlotte.
Me: Yes, I know.
Nell: Are they aware of the viewing?
Me: Why?
Nell: We don’t want them finding themselves having to show strangers around the house.
Me: Why would they do that?
Nell: It happened to my friend Dorothy. She was visiting Pamela the Pyrenean Mountain Dog.
Me: The one who talked about your weight?
Nell: Never mind that. Pamela was selling her house and Dorothy found herself showing a family of Afghans around.
Me: How?
Nell: Pamela went shopping and forgot.
Me: Where were the estate agents?
Nell: That’s not the point. We don’t want Naughty Nigel showing prospective buyers around.
Me: No. Sorry.
