Me: Sometimes there’s nothing better than a good old paddle or swim in a river.
Nell: Less of the old, please.
Me: You know what I mean.
Nell: Actually, the stones can be a little hard and slippery under paw.
Me: I agree but it’s worth it for the deliciousness of that crystal clear water.
Nell: How would you know?
Me: You told me.
Nell: I said it was refreshing. I didn’t mention the word deliciousness.
Me: I was embellishing.
Nell: You were getting carried away again. Now, word on the street is the Beefies are having an election party on Thursday.
Me: Word on the street? You mean you heard it from your friend Dorothy.
Nell: Yes. Dorothy says everyone’s been invited.
Me: I haven’t.
Nell: Of course you haven’t. You’re clearly in the ‘David Martin for Mayor of Kingsbridge’ camp.
Me: You bet I am.
Nell: The Beefies have asked Lionel King to bring The Great Barberino to sing to the voters.
Me: Will they never learn?
Nell: And Lionel has agreed.
Me: I told you he hadn’t changed.
Nell: But he has. Lionel is going to take The Fake Barberino.
Me: The one who can’t sing?
Nell: Yes, when he starts howling Stephen Seagull will be a laughing stock and nobody will vote for him.
Me: I feel a bit sorry for The Fake Barberino. He probably thinks he has a lovely voice.
Nell: No, he doesn’t. He’s one of Sally’s spies and his name is George.
Me: George Michael had a wonderful voice.
Nell: Well, George Schnauzer doesn’t.
Me: We should have an election party on Thursday too.
Nell: It’s already in the pipeline. In fact Poppy is making sausage rolls as we speak.
Me: My favourite.
Nell: They’re for Thursday. Not now.
Me: Yes. Sorry.