Poppy is Innocent (Probably)

Me: Why is PC Panda in our kitchen eating scones and staring at Poppy while scrolling through his iBone?

Nell: It’s my iBone actually.

Me: Even more worrying.

Nell: Le Champignon Bleu have made a complaint.

Me: The Blue Mushroom? About yesterday?

Nell: Yes. They said orders weren’t received and those that were, arrived in a less than acceptable condition.

Me: Your croissants were still delicious.

Nell: I know but a Dalmatian’s eclairs burst on impact. There was cream everywhere.

Me: I think you’ll find it was crème patissiere.

Nell: Whatever. It had to lick them out of the bag.

Me: I can imagine. Eclairs are messy at the best of times.

Nell: Anyway, several witnesses claim they saw a small terrier with a bow and arrow so Poppy is in trouble.

Me: Oh dear. What’s all this got to do with your iBone?

Nell: I have photographic evidence that Poppy was inside the house during the whole of yesterday.

Me: You do?

Nell: Yes. She watched Sunday Songs from your bedroom window and was joined by Harriet and David who stayed with her the whole day.

Me: They did?

Nell: Yes. After cooking and serving an excellent roast Poppy retired exhausted to the dog basket under the kitchen table with the aforementioned puppies.

Me: You mean Dave and Harriet?

Nell: Yes.

Me: Only you called them puppies.

Nell: That’s not the point. Later she enjoyed a small snack on the stairs and then spent the rest of the evening in front of the fire.

Me: I can vouch for that.

Nell: All this proves that it must have been another terrier. There are plenty of them around.

Me: Not with bows and arrows.

Nell: Quiet. Nobody asked you and if they do, you know nothing.

Me: Of course. Sorry.

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