Me: There’s a lioness in the kitchen eating smoked salmon and scrambled eggs.
Nell: Yes, I know. She’s sharing a luxury breakfast with The Cat.
Me: A luxury breakfast?
Nell: Yes. There’s caviar and Poppy has made blinis.
Me: Aren’t blinis Russian pancakes?
Nell: Yes.
Me: Poppy has never made blinis for us.
Nell: I know.
Me: Why not?
Nell: Probably because we didn’t win a luxury breakfast in the New Year’s raffle.
Me: But the lioness did?
Nell: No. The Cat did. The lioness just happened to come into the kitchen when The Cat was eating, so it asked her to stay.
Me: Do you think that really ‘just happened’?Don’t you think the lioness knew there might be a luxury breakfast going spare and just decided to join in?
Nell: It wasn’t going spare. Anyway, Mrs King has come to see Sally about Oliver. She had no idea about any luxury breakfasts.
Me: Mrs King? That’s rather formal.
Nell: We’ve only just met.
Me: I wonder if she’s called Elsa. If I had a lioness that would be my name for it.
Nell: Well, this lioness is a free spirit and her name is Carole.
Me: Carole? Do you think she can sing?
Nell: Why bring singing into it? She’s not a corgi.
Me: Never mind. What does she want to tell Sally about Oliver?
Nell: Isn’t it obvious?
Me: Oh my goodness. Mrs King is Roary’s mother. We’ve found Roary’s mother.
Nell: Yes, Sherlock Martin. Although, I think you will find Roary’s mother found us.
Me; Did she put him in our loft?
Nell: She did and since the kidnapping she has been hiding in the treehouse.
Me: With Oliver?
Nell: Yes, and much more to the point, with her companion and secret love, Beauregard.
Me: Gosh. Sorry.
