

Me: Don’t look at me like that, Nell. There’s nothing I can do.
Nell: You’re going to your first book signing on Sunday without me.
Me: Dogs aren’t allowed in the village hall and I can’t leave you outside for hours and hours.
Nell: Sign the books outside then.
Me: It’s a Christmas Market for dog people and the tables are all inside.
Nell: Dog people with no dogs?
Me: Some of them might leave the dogs in the car but I don’t want to do that.
Nell: Selfish.
Me: You don’t even like socialising.
Nell: That depends. I have an invitation to tea at Windsor Castle from The Queen, by the way.
Me: Really?
Nell: The Queen likes to keep an eye on all of her royal corgis, good or bad, and she heard Lady Anwen had been released.
Me: Couldn’t you just chat about it on the iBone or zoom each other?
Nell: The Queen prefers face to face discussions wherever possible.
Me: How are you getting there?
Nell: She’s sending a car.
Me: When are you going?
Nell: Next week. I told her I can’t get away until after the final of Strictly and she quite understood.
Me: That was kind of her.
Nell: She watches it on television, you know. She says the royal corgis are simply glued to the screen every week.
Me: How lovely.
Nell: Yes, if Harriet wins I might ask if I can take her with me.
Me: What if Gladys wins?
Nell: I’m afraid Gladys is a little too wild for The Queen. We don’t want her swinging from the chandeliers. You know what she’s like.
Me: Yes.
Nell: Harriet is nice and quiet.
Me: Unless she sees the sea.
Nell: Windsor Castle is nowhere near the sea.
Me: No. Sorry.