Suspicious Sightings

Nell: When will you be home?

Me: Later this afternoon.

Nell: Poppy and the Puppies are waiting at the window.

Me: It’s far too early to be doing that.

Nell: There are no Sunday Songs today so they might as well.

Me: No Sunday Songs?

Nell: The Welsh corgi choir have lost their voices. Why else do you think we allowed those awful rooks to sing at Strictly yesterday?

Me: Was their singing awful?

Nell: Yes. Worse than The Beefies which is saying something.

Me: How was the dancing?

Nell: Malcolm fell off Alejandro’s back in the middle of their Charleston. Princess clapped which was both annoying and unnecessary.

Me: It’s a seal thing. What about Harriet and Beauregard?

Nell: They danced beautifully but Lionel King still gave them a 3. A ridiculously low score. The lifts alone deserved at least an 8.

Me: Who is at risk?

Nell: If it was up to me Poppy and Stephen Seagull would be in trouble.

Me: Didn’t their quickstep go well?

Nell: Chasing someone around the dance floor with a sword is not dancing in my opinion, although others disagreed.

Me: Who?

Nell: Lionel King gave them a 10 and so did Princess.

Me: Why?

Nell: She said she loved the drama of it and she always gives 10s. The lion just did it for badness.

Me: Dreadful animal.

Nell: Can you see the island and the hotel from your balcony?

Me: In the distance.

Nell: Well, get your binoculars because there have been some suspicious sightings.

Me: I don’t have my binoculars with me.

Nell: Borrow some. Think on your paws.

Me: What am I looking for?

Nell: A ship, a lion, some rooks and a corgi.

Me: A corgi?

Nell: Stop questioning everything and get the binoculars.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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