

Me: You’re looking a little serious this morning.
Nell: I’ve had some disturbing news.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: You know Pamela?
Me: The one you met at the vets during your weigh in?
Nell: It wasn’t a weigh in. We aren’t boxers you know.
Me: No. You’re a Labrador and Pamela’s a Pyrenean Mountain Dog.
Nell: Anyway, Pamela was chatting to my friend Dorothy on WoofsApp.
Me: The Salcombe Setter?
Nell: Yes. And it seems my pearls are up for auction on eBray.
Me: That’s awful, Nell. Are you going to put in a bid?
Nell: Certainly not. They’re mine. I’ve reported it to the police.
Me: Good for you.
Nell: PC Panda is due to arrive here soon to interview me.
Me: How do you know they’re yours? Don’t they look awfully similar?
Nell: Mine have NM on the clasp.
Me: I see.
Nell: Charlie gave them to me. They are of huge sentimental value.
Me: So the Beefies must be working with the donkeys?
Nell: Rupert says we mustn’t jump to conclusions. The donkeys might not know the pearls are stolen.
Me: He’s right. Trust Knitwear Wolf to be the voice of reason.
Nell: Rupert is a sensible animal.
Me: Who’s the seller?
Nell: Someone called Simba. I don’t know anyone with that name. Do you?
Me: No. I just remember it from The Lion King. Chris loved that film when he was young. So did I, if I’m honest.
Nell: That’s it. Simba is Lionel King. He’s up to his old tricks again.
Me: I thought he was in custody.
Nell: They released him because he agreed to cooperate with their investigations.
Me: The scoundrel. A leopard can’t change its spots, I suppose.
Nell: Why bring leopards into this? We are talking lions here.
Me: Yes. Sorry.