Me: I can’t believe Dave and Harriet are four today. They were only puppies yesterday. Look at those photos.
Nell: Poppy is preparing a special birthday menu.
Me: How exciting. What is it?
Nell: Bacon.
Me: Yes, but what else?
Nell: That’s it. Bacon sandwiches for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Me: What about the cake? I don’t think I can manage a bacon cake.
Nell: I’m only joking. The cake is going to be a light vanilla sponge with butter icing and ‘Happy Birthday Dave and Harriet’ written on the top.
Me: Perfect.
Nell: Manuel is doing the icing. He’s a whizz with a piping bag.
Me: Is there really only bacon?
Nell: Of course not. David will have a side of bacon sandwiches with every meal but nobody else has to.
Me: What a relief.
Nell: I shall manage the odd sandwich, or two I expect. It would be rude not to. Where’s your hat?
Me: Am I supposed to be wearing one?
Nell: What kind of a question is that? Hats go with birthdays like jam with cream.
Me: I don’t always have jam with cream.
Nell: No scones for you then. Have you polished your shoes?
Me: I didn’t know I had to.
Nell: How are you going to join in the tap dancing if your shoes aren’t shiny?
Me: Tap dancing?
Nell: It’s the puppies’ birthday. Of course there will be tap dancing.
Me: Is everyone joining in?
Nell: Yes. In their own way. Some are not suited to dancing, like Princess, and will clap along.
Me: I don’t expect Henry and Horst will be dancing either.
Nell: I beg your pardon? Didn’t you notice their top hats? Now, hurry up. The Whippets Institute minibus just pulled up and you aren’t even dressed.
Me: Yes. Sorry.
