Me: The puppies are looking awfully worried.
Nell: They are not puppies. They will be 4 in June.
Me: They are always going to be puppies to me. What have they done?
Nell: They had a second breakfast.
Me: Lots of people do that. Sometimes fruit, or cereal, simply isn’t enough. You need something more substantial to get you through the day. Especially on a gloomy Monday.
Nell: Fruit, or cereal? They had bacon sandwiches.
Me: Were the bacon sandwiches their first, or second breakfast?
Nell: That is not the point.
Me: It is though, Nell. Sometimes you need something sweet to end off a meal.
Nell: It was definitely sweet.
Me: What was it?
Nell: A Victoria sponge. Freshly baked. Dusted with icing sugar and filled with jam. Waiting to be served for afternoon tea.
Me: Oh dear. It was probably a mistake.
Nell: They licked the plate. I’ve grown to expect this from David, but Harriet?
Me: How do you know it was them? It could have been anyone.
Nell: They had icing sugar all around their mouths and crumbs in their hair.
Me: I’m sure there was a very good reason. Have you asked them?
Nell: Of course I have.
Me: What did they say?
Nell: They said, and I quote, ‘It was the only way to ward off a terrible attack of the Mondays.’
Me: Well, there you are. That sounds like a perfectly reasonable excuse to me.
Nell: What do you mean ‘There you are’?
Me: The Mondays is a dreadful thing to have. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
Nell: You told them to say that, didn’t you?
Me: Who? Me?
Nell: The minute I heard them say it, I knew it sounded like something you would say.
Me: They needed my help. Sorry.
