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In Cahoots

Me: There’s really nothing like a walk along the beach is there? Especially with the sun going down and the wind in your hair.

Nell: Here we go. The wind is a little too strong for my liking, if you must know, and the sea is rather cold on the paws.

Me: Just embrace it all and listen to the gentle sound of the waves and the calling of the seagulls.

Nell: The calling of the seagulls? What on earth is wrong with you? Didn’t you hear what those Beefies were saying?

Me: Evil Mrs Poppy Snow?

Nell: Apart from that

Me: No. What were they saying?

Nell: ‘Dastardly Dave.’

Me: My Big Brave Beautiful Boy is not dastardly. He is a darling.

Nell: I know that. They are trying to cause trouble. If you ask me, the Beefies are in cahoots with Russell.

Me: I love that.

Nell: Excuse me?

Me: In cahoots. Did you know it comes from the French word ‘cahute’ meaning cabin?

Nell: I don’t care where it comes from. Russell is working with the Beefies.

Me: Well, that won’t do. The Cat has to apologise and give up writing the column.

Nell: Cats never apologise.

Me: Why can’t it write its own column? ‘Ask The Cat.’

Nell: That’s an excellent suggestion.

Me: Yes, and it might even be quite popular.

Nell: I’m not so sure about that. Cats don’t care what people think, you know.

Me: Exactly. They tell it like it is. How did it start writing Dave’s column in the first place?

Nell: The Daily Growl told him he couldn’t mention bacon so he ran out of ideas.

Me: I see. I suppose he was suggesting bacon sandwiches were the answer rather often.

Nell: That’s because they are.

Me: Yes, of course. Sorry.

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