Me: There’s really nothing like a walk along the beach is there? Especially with the sun going down and the wind in your hair.
Nell: Here we go. The wind is a little too strong for my liking, if you must know, and the sea is rather cold on the paws.
Me: Just embrace it all and listen to the gentle sound of the waves and the calling of the seagulls.
Nell: The calling of the seagulls? What on earth is wrong with you? Didn’t you hear what those Beefies were saying?
Me: Evil Mrs Poppy Snow?
Nell: Apart from that
Me: No. What were they saying?
Nell: ‘Dastardly Dave.’
Me: My Big Brave Beautiful Boy is not dastardly. He is a darling.
Nell: I know that. They are trying to cause trouble. If you ask me, the Beefies are in cahoots with Russell.
Me: I love that.
Nell: Excuse me?
Me: In cahoots. Did you know it comes from the French word ‘cahute’ meaning cabin?
Nell: I don’t care where it comes from. Russell is working with the Beefies.
Me: Well, that won’t do. The Cat has to apologise and give up writing the column.
Nell: Cats never apologise.
Me: Why can’t it write its own column? ‘Ask The Cat.’
Nell: That’s an excellent suggestion.
Me: Yes, and it might even be quite popular.
Nell: I’m not so sure about that. Cats don’t care what people think, you know.
Me: Exactly. They tell it like it is. How did it start writing Dave’s column in the first place?
Nell: The Daily Growl told him he couldn’t mention bacon so he ran out of ideas.
Me: I see. I suppose he was suggesting bacon sandwiches were the answer rather often.
Nell: That’s because they are.
Me: Yes, of course. Sorry.
