Naughty Nigel pays a visit

Me: Now, this is going to surprise you.

Nell: What have the llamas done now? You know they’ve started dancing on the hay bales.

Me: It’s not the llamas. Why would anyone dance on a hay bale? They are prickly.

Nell: Maximum exposure, apparently. Our Penguin has been filming them for Princess’s new documentary.

Me: I didn’t know she was making one.

Nell: Oh yes. It’s called Down in Devon.

Me: Is it about depression? Only there’s a lot of it about at the moment with the new regulations and the nights drawing in.

Nell: No. Stop jumping to conclusions. It’s about life in Devon. It’s supposed to be uplifting.

Me: I see. Well, the llamas are extremely uplifting so they are off to a good start.

Nell: Well, what is surprising then?

Me: Naughty Nigel is here.

Nell: Yes, I know he is. Sally wants to talk to him.

Me: So he’s come all the way from Buckinghamshire?

Nell: No. Your sister Charlotte is moving down to Devon. You know that.

Me: Yes, but she’s not moving in until next week.

Nell: Well, Nigel has been here all morning.

Me: I wonder what Sally wants from him.

Nell: Maybe she wants his help with Poppy.

Me: He does have winning ways.

Nell: Or, she wants him to befriend Babycakes Gillespie.

Me: They both have a touch of the naughty about them.

Nell: A touch of the naughty? Babycakes is a bounder.

Me: Babycakes is charming, even if you don’t approve. John is lovely, but he’s not exciting.

Nell: John used to work for MI5. You can’t get more exciting than that.

Me: Yes, but sometimes it’s not what you do, it’s who you are. Not all spies are as charismatic as Charlie.

Nell: He was unique.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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