Me: Look at Marvin in his special Canadian scarf. Darling boy.

Nell: You forgot Canada Day.

Me: I didn’t forget it. I just remembered it a little late.

Nell: Anyway, we have shocking news about Gladys?

Me: Is she in danger?

Nell: No, she has gone over to the other side.

Me: Where? Dartmouth?

Nell: No. She is Sleeping with the Enemy.

Me: She’s not dumped Alejandro for a Beefy has she? Only that would be shocking.

Nell: No. She’s been having talks with our rivals. Well, Rupert and The Cat’s rivals to be exact.

Me: How do you know?

Nell: Henry and Horst went undercover as sequinned brooches on her hat.

Me: Gosh. Those boys certainly live dangerously.

Nell: May I continue?

Me: Yes. Please do.

Nell: Have you heard of Glamourpuss?

Me: No.

Nell: It’s a very glitzy fashion line popular with the more theatrically inclined.

Me: Sounds just like Gladys’s cup of tea.

Nell: Yes, that’s why they want Gladys to be the face of the brand.

Me: She would be perfect.

Nell: But what about her loyalty towards Rupert and The Cat?

Me: Can’t they all work together, Nell? Knitwear Wolf’s clothing is all natural wool. It’s not glitz and glamour.

Nell: I don’t know.

Me: A Rolls Royce just pulled up outside. Someone’s getting out.

Nell: Who is it?

Me: An extremely flashy Persian cat in a velvet cloak dripping with diamonds.

Nell: That’ll be Zsa Zsa The Paw.

Me: Zsa Zsa The Paw?

Nell: Owner of Glamourpuss and The Cat’s Hungarian cousin. Gladys said she was coming to tea.

Me: She’s saying something. It sounds like ‘Vere’s my darlink Voolfy?’

Nell: Your Hungarian accent is dreadful.

Me: Rupert is escorting her inside. Now that’s surprising.

Nell: What?

Me: He’s wearing a velvet jacket. Sorry.

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