Nell: Who on earth is Dominic Cummings?
Me: You don’t want to know.
Nell: He’s everywhere.
Me: Yes. That’s part of the problem.
Nell: You can’t open a newspaper without seeing him.
Me: I know.
Nell: I thought it was that awful Dominic Simmons at first.
Me: Who?
Nell: You know Dominic Simmons.
Me: Do I?
Nell: The Siamese jeweller with a whiny voice.
Me: Wasn’t he a friend of The Cat’s?
Nell: An acquaintance, not a friend. The Cat introduced him to us. We were invited to dinner and the wretched creature tried to sell us some highly suspect pieces.
Me: Really?
Nell: It was like an unexpected Tupperware party but at least you know you are going to one of those.
Me: Yes.
Nell: I seem to remember David was tempted by a gold chain and Poppy was rather keen on a jewel encrusted dagger but fortunately they resisted.
Me: Weren’t the jewels fake?
Nell: Yes, Dominic was what some would call ‘dodgy’ and ended up being blackmailed by the Beefies. Those creatures get their beaks into everything.
Me: Talking of Beefies was there any attempt to free Lady Anwen?
Nell: No. PC Panda said the journey was fairly straightforward. They discovered some tainted bacon hidden under her hat but it was removed before any damage could be done.
Me: I don’t think Dave should ever wear a gold chain. He’s not that kind of dog.
Nell: What are you talking about?
Me: You said he was tempted by Dominic Simmons.
Nell: David has always enjoyed dressing up. When I think about some of the outfits he and Gladys have worn.
Me: I don’t think you should criticise. You’ve been known to wear the odd tiara.
Nell: Only when required and always discreetly.
Me: Yes, of course. Sorry.
