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No hooves

Me: I think Harriet might have been a mermaid in another life. She loves the sea so much.

Nell: You know perfectly well that mermaids do not exist.

Me: You can never be sure. Stranger things have happened.

Nell: Nonsense. Did you notice those greyhounds in red coats on the beach?

Me: I did actually.

Nell: Retired athletes. Charming manners.

Me: Dave seems a bit overexcited today.

Nell: He ate a bowl of yoghurt by mistake. He thought it was whipped cream for Poppy’s Pavlova.

Me: He shouldn’t be eating whipped cream and why is Poppy making Pavlova?

Nell: Lady Anwen is coming to tea to discuss the royal visit.

Me: Is everything going to plan?

Nell: The Whippets Institute have said we can borrow their minibus to get to the Palace.

Me: That’s kind of them.

Nell: But there has been an issue with the larger animals.

Me: No room in the minibus?

Nell: That too, but the main issue is that Her Majesty is not keen on hooves inside the Palace.

Me: Oh dear. I suppose she has a point.

Nell: Yes, her horses never join her in the state rooms. Meetings are held in the stables.

Me: Quite. Could you all eat outside?

Nell: It isn’t really the weather for a garden party. No, I’m afraid it looks like they will have to stay at home.

Me: But Alejandro has a new sombrero. Gladys would never leave him behind.

Nell: I know.

Me: I’ve had a brilliant idea.

Nell: Oh dear.

Me: What if they all wear boots?

Nell: Boots?

Me: Knitwear Wolf wears boots all the time. He must know where to get some.

Nell: Good idea. Well done.

Me: I’ve got a hat and boots.

Nell: It’s animals only. Next time, perhaps.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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