Getting ready

Me: What is Dave doing to Harriet?

Nell: She was a little salty faced after her swim so he is tidying her up.

Me: That’s kind of him.

Nell: We Labradors like to maintain standards and David is particularly keen on clean ears.

Me: Yes, I’ve noticed. I’m not sure she is enjoying it though.

Nell: Face and ear cleaning is something one endures not enjoys.

Me: I see.

Nell: It is quite different to a gentle ear massage which is most relaxing.

Me: Yes, you like those. Would you like one now?

Nell: Certainly not. Now is a most inappropriate time. We have a whole line of Merry Dogs waiting for their morning scones.

Me: I didn’t know they got morning scones.

Nell: Of course they do. They’ve been rehearsing since dawn. An animal can’t survive on enthusiasm alone, you know.

Me: You are right.

Nell: And someone needs to wake the beasts in the barn.

Me: Are the cows performing too?

Nell: They are far too busy. Caroline has a vast number of orders for dairy products at this time of year.

Me: Caroline?

Nell: The cow who runs the dairy. She delivers every morning. Do keep up.

Me: I haven’t heard her.

Nell: I suppose her milk float is quite quiet. It’s electric you know. How it gets up and down those hills is beyond me.

Me: I’ve heard bells.

Nell: She wears those round her neck. Awfully clunky for a necklace but there’s no arguing with her.

Me: Who are the beasts in the barn then?

Nell: Olive, Alejandro and Monty. We discussed this yesterday.

Me: I forgot.

Nell: Anyway, start distributing the scones, please.

Me: I would love one, too.

Nell: The last time I looked you were not a Merry Dog.

Me: No. Sorry.

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