Me: What is Dave doing to Harriet?
Nell: She was a little salty faced after her swim so he is tidying her up.
Me: That’s kind of him.
Nell: We Labradors like to maintain standards and David is particularly keen on clean ears.
Me: Yes, I’ve noticed. I’m not sure she is enjoying it though.
Nell: Face and ear cleaning is something one endures not enjoys.
Me: I see.
Nell: It is quite different to a gentle ear massage which is most relaxing.
Me: Yes, you like those. Would you like one now?
Nell: Certainly not. Now is a most inappropriate time. We have a whole line of Merry Dogs waiting for their morning scones.
Me: I didn’t know they got morning scones.
Nell: Of course they do. They’ve been rehearsing since dawn. An animal can’t survive on enthusiasm alone, you know.
Me: You are right.
Nell: And someone needs to wake the beasts in the barn.
Me: Are the cows performing too?
Nell: They are far too busy. Caroline has a vast number of orders for dairy products at this time of year.
Nell: The cow who runs the dairy. She delivers every morning. Do keep up.
Me: I haven’t heard her.
Nell: I suppose her milk float is quite quiet. It’s electric you know. How it gets up and down those hills is beyond me.
Me: I’ve heard bells.
Nell: She wears those round her neck. Awfully clunky for a necklace but there’s no arguing with her.
Me: Who are the beasts in the barn then?
Nell: Olive, Alejandro and Monty. We discussed this yesterday.
Me: I forgot.
Nell: Anyway, start distributing the scones, please.
Me: I would love one, too.
Nell: The last time I looked you were not a Merry Dog.
Me: No. Sorry.