Me: It’s hard to believe Mutley will be 17 this month, isn’t it?
Nell: That’s because he won’t.
Me: What do you mean?
Nell: You got his age wrong again. He will only be 16.
Me: That’s wonderful news.
Nell: Yes, but I’ve got to send the banner back and The Cat is having to resequin his bomber jacket.
Me: Is there such a word as resequin?
Nell: There is now. Ask The Cat.
Me: Oh dear. Although I’m not sure Mutley is a bomber jacket kind of dog.
Nell: Are you coming to Mutley’s talk this evening?
Me: I didn’t know there was one.
Nell: Yes. ‘Memoirs of a Travelling Mutt’. He will be discussing the time he toured the United States with his swing band.
Me: How lovely.
Nell: Yes. He and David are performing a few numbers with Knitwear Wolf. Personally I think wearing cardigans is a little dated but The Cat says they are wonderfully retro.
Me: Maybe Knitwear Wolf is actually a hipster.
Nell: Don’t be silly. He’s a wolf not a Bearded Collie.
Me: Is anyone else performing?
Nell: Alejandro. He’s singing with Gladys and the Pups.
Me: Don’t you mean Pips?
Nell: Certainly not. They’re Pomeranians not pears.
Me: What are they singing?
Nell: ‘Tequila’. Alejandro struggles with his English so it was an easy song to learn.
Me: It would be. It only has one word.
Nell: Fortunately the Whippets Institute Big Band were free.
Me: They have a Big Band?
Nell: Yes. Gladys plays the trumpet with them occasionally.
Me: I hope there’s going to be dancing.
Nell: Of course. You can’t have tequila without dancing.
Me: So cocktails for everyone then?
Nell: Except Timothy.
Me: Why?
Nell: Turkeys can’t take their tequila. Everyone knows that.
Me: Oh, I see. Sorry.