Nell: Is Poppy flying somewhere, only the last time I saw her she was in bed with a hangover?
Me: A lot of people didn’t know she flew helicopters so I thought I would show them a photo of her. Is she ok?
Nell: She was watching Top Gun with Gladys until late. Her favourite film. I think whisky might have been involved.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: So just toast and marmalade for breakfast this morning as Malcolm has a fitting at The Cat’s for his wedding suit.
Me: Top hat and tails?
Nell: No. Sequinned cloak.
Me: Salmon pink?
Nell: No. Black. It compliments his flamingo colours.
Me: Will Susan be wearing sequins too?
Nell: No. She has chosen a soft grey cloak with a hood. She’s a very modest seagull.
Me: It’s a funny thing in the bird world that the males are often the flamboyant ones.
Nell: Yes. But look at David. Flamboyance is his middle name. He even has sequins on his wetsuit.
Me: I know. It says ‘Dave’ on the back.
Nell: Ridiculous animal and why is he wearing a bandana on his head?
Me: It really suits him, Nell, and it keeps the sun off.
Nell: Harriet has taken to carrying a parasol. A far more elegant solution.
Me: Yes, but Dave’s not a parasol kind of boy.
Nell: Perhaps not. Although nothing would surprise me with David.
Nell: I don’t believe it. The cheek of it.
Me: What’s happened?
Nell: An alpaca just walked past in a sky blue waistcoat.
Me: It’s not something I would expect to see, but each to their own. Maybe it’s been to The Cat’s for a fitting.
Nell: It was wearing sunglasses and carrying my handbag.
Me: Oh dear. That is rather cheeky. Sorry.