Me: You’ve just eaten something tasty. Admit it.
Nell: I may have.
Nell: Poppy made my Cream Tea ice cream for Gelato to try.
Me: I bet it’s delicious.
Nell: Yes. Poppy’s scones are essential, though, which is why she’s invited Gelato to tea.
Me: She wants a piece of the action.
Nell: She wants to discuss working together. Stop talking like an American gangster.
Me: It’s the hot weather. It makes people act strangely.
Nell: Yes. The Beefies have started wearing sombreros.
Me: Probably wise in this heat.
Nell: Beefies don’t get sunstroke. They are doing it to draw attention to themselves.
Me: It rather suits them.
Nell: That’s not the point. They want people to look up.
Nell: So they can drop a mackerel on their heads.
Nell: They have been targeting the ice cream queues.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: Gelato is shocked. He thought they were his friends.
Nell: You know the way they shout ‘Mine’ all the time?
Me: Yes. Greedy gulls.
Nell: He thought they were saying ‘Hi’.
Me: Oh dear. So you want to help?
Nell: Yes. We discussed the problem at Morning Thoughts and decided that we are going to have to use pistols.
Me: I thought you said violence wasn’t the answer.
Nell: Water pistols. Gladys will be in command.
Nell: Several of the more level headed Welsh corgis will have pistols concealed about their persons.
Me: Where? They’re only little.
Nell: Under their hats, if you must know.
Nell: When a Beefy approaches Gladys will shout ‘Fire’.
Me: I’m not sure the tourists are going to enjoy this.
Nell: I disagree. It’s better than a wet mackerel and might actually be rather fun to watch.
Me: You are right. Sorry.