Nell: David has registered a complaint on his feedback form.

Me: What feedback form?

Nell: We all have them. They are submitted once a month.

Me: I’ve never seen one.

Nell: Kev does yours. It works best that way. We need concise feedback not ramblings.

Me: That’s not fair. I don’t ramble.

Nell: Anyway, David feels strongly that portion sizes have been reduced.

Me: Is that why he has been carrying his bowl around?

Nell: Yes. His Oliver Twist act. Only now he scrapes at it with his paw. So annoying.

Me: It is.

Nell: I’ve told him that the committee will review his complaint and get back to him.

Me: What committee?

Nell: Honestly, sometimes I wonder if you are living in the real world. How do you think everything here runs so smoothly?

Me: Who is on the committee?

Nell: Myself, Mutley and Poppy with guest member Jonathan representing visitors. Oh, and Kev of course.

Me: Kev? Why not me?

Nell: You are not a committee person. We need decision makers.

Me: May I point out that Mutley is deaf?

Nell: All feedback is submitted in writing. Do keep up. Now, if you could stop criticising our members I would like to go to my meeting. The others are waiting and we have a complaint to discuss.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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