Statues and snacks

Me: What are the puppies doing?

Nell: Playing statues. Harriet has got the dinosaur look just right.

Me: Dinosaur?

Nell: Notice the long necked dinosaur behind her? Same pose.

Me: Very clever.

Nell: Yes. She is the reigning champion.

Me: I’ll have to try it.

Nell: Please don’t.

Me: Did the committee reach a decision on the size of portions?

Nell: Kev suggested lean venison snacks as a top up for David when he is being Marvellous.

Me: Good idea.

Nell: Yes. It encourages good behaviour and is nutritional. Weigh-ins are now compulsory for those on the list.

Me: Oh no.

Nell: Yours can be done in private.

Me: What a relief. Wasn’t Kitten supposed to be visiting Malcolm by the way?

Nell: She cancelled. Something to do with an emergency manicure. I found him weeping into his cornflakes this morning.

Me: Oh dear.

Nell: The Cat suggested Linda and I’m beginning to think it might be right.

Me: Who is Linda?

Nell: You mean what is Linda? Everyone uses it. You swipe to the left or right. Gladys is on it all the time and Mutley is considering it.

Me: You mean Tinder.

Nell: I do not. What kind of a name is that?

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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