Me: Nell, have you got a moment?
Nell: I am enjoying the scenery.
Me: No, you aren’t.
Nell: If you must know I am keeping an eye on a very suspicious Border Terrier in a flat cap.
Nell: Stop looking.
Nell: It’s the downside of being a celebrity I suppose.
Me: What is?
Nell: Stalking. David was mobbed by whippets when he went into Plymouth. He and The Cat went to pick up a few items from Pribark.
Me: How annoying.
Nell: They loved it. David gave an impromptu performance with a passing chihuahua. I wouldn’t be surprised if isn’t already on the internet.
Me: Gosh. We live in a strange world of friends who we’ve never met, don’t we?
Nell: We do.
Me: People share their ups and downs and even what they have for breakfast.
Nell: Yes, I quite enjoy talking to you about life over a pot of Earl Grey and some toast and marmalade.
Me: I mean on the internet.
Nell: I don’t do that.
Me: Yes, you do. We share our conversations every day.
Nell: We do?
Me: You know we do. People love you.
Nell: That’s extremely gratifying. Please pass on my thanks.
Me: You already have.
Nell: Don’t be silly. Anyway, on another note, what do you feel about camping?
Me: I’m not a fan.
Nell: Jim seems to think it would be just the ticket. A few days of quiet in the countryside.
Me: I can’t see you in a tent. You enjoy your home comforts too much.
Nell: You’ll enjoy it when you are there.
Me: What? Why am I included in camping but not the Royal Wedding, or Wimbledon?
Nell: “Yours is not to reason why. Yours is just to nod and sigh.”
Me: Yes, sorry.