Me: Why has Mutley climbed on the compost bags?
Nell: So he can see the Big House.
Me: Why?
Nell: He is taking The Cat to lunch at the yacht club.
Me: Goodness me.
Nell: It’s ridiculous at his age. He’s behaving like a love sick teenager. It’s worse than Harriet and Jim. I don’t know what people are going to think when he turns up with that painted clawed floozy.
Me: Do you think The Cat feels the same way?
Nell: Of course it doesn’t. It’s after his money.
Me: I didn’t know he had any.
Nell: Mutley owns properties all over London.
Me: He does?
Nell: Yes. He’s known as The Dogfather. You must have heard him mention The Blind Barker.
Me: Yes. It’s a friend, isn’t it?
Nell: No. Silly. It’s his pub. Look, there it comes.
Me: It’s wearing a diamanté collar.
Nell: Good grief. Who wears a feather boa in the middle of the day?
Me: Dave?
Nell: Apart from David. Honestly I thought Mutley would have more sense at his age.
Me: Why is he called The Dogfather?
Nell: It comes from his time as an East End gangster. It’s a sign of respect. That Cat better behave, or they will be sending the boys round.
Me: The farm dogs?
Nell: No, the farm dogs are amateurs. You really have no idea, do you?
Me: No, sorry.