Me: Is Dave ok?
Nell: David is having some quiet after the altercations of this morning.
Me: What altercations?
Nell: I am afraid he fell foul of the farm dogs from next door.
Me: Oh no! Was there a fight?
Nell: No. Just verbal abuse but upsetting enough.
Me: Poor Dave.
Nell: They questioned his parentage.
Me: Oh dear.
Nell: They suggested he wasn’t a pedigree labrador.
Me: But he is.
Nell: They even mentioned a Great Dane.
Nell: Don’t worry. I found his Kennel Club papers and we went through them together.
Me: Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with a colourful past. Look at Poppy. Goodness knows what her background is.
Me: Yes. Sorry.