Me: Look at this sweet photo of the Puppies asleep in Kev’s studio. Kev just sent it to me. Bless them.
Nell: Is that real?
Me: What do you mean?
Nell: There’s a lot of Artificial Nonsense around at the moment.
Me: You mean AI. Artificial Intelligence. Although an ai is actually a three-toed sloth.
Nell: Why bring sloths into this? I’m talking about David and Harriet.
Me: You know they’re real. You saw them at breakfast.
Nell: But look at Harriet.
Me: She’s sleeping.
Nell: She’s bigger than David.
Me: Of course she isn’t.
Nell: Look at her long legs and body. She’s absolutely huge,
Me: It’s the angle. She’s in the foreground so she seems bigger.
Nell: Are you sure?
Me: Yes.
Nell: Go and check.
Me: No.
Nell: What if there’s a Giant Harriet upstairs and a tiny David?
Me: There isn’t. I promise you. They’ll both come downstairs soon and you’ll see for yourself.
Nell: I’m very worried. Shout ‘Bacon!’.
Me: Why would I do that?
Nell: Because they’ll run downstairs.
Me: But we haven’t got any bacon, it’s Tuesday.
Nell: Shout ‘Biscuits!’ then.
Me: You’re overreacting.
Nell: Just do it.
Me: You’re making me nervous now.
Nell: See.
Me: I’m half expecting a Giant Harriet even though I know it’s nonsense.
Nell: Just call them.
Me: It can’t be the pizza. We all ate it and you and I are the same.
Nell: So was Harriet when she went upstairs a few minutes ago.
Me: Did you say minutes?
Nell: Yes. We didn’t finish breakfast until late because David ate the eggs by mistake and we needed new ones.
Me: So, you think Ordinary Harriet went upstairs and a few minutes later she turned into Giant Harriet?
Nell: Harriet is not Ordinary.
Me: No. Sorry.
