Me: Do you know why Harriet was collecting the Spaghetti Bolognese from Stan at the Bus Stop this morning?
Nell: Don’t call him, Stan, please. His name is Stanley.
Me: I thought it was Dave’s job to collect the Tupperware?
Nell: David was up late watching The Traitors so he missed the alarm and Harriet had to go.
Me: Stanley could actually start bringing it to the house now that we know who he is, couldn’t he?
Nell: No. Leaving it at the Bus Stop is fine.
Me: But it’s not very kind or grateful of you all, Nell.
Nell: We say Grazie Mille.
Me: Your Italian really is very good. I have a theory about that.
Nell: Here we go.
Me: I think Stanley is putting something in the food to help you speak Italian.
Nell: Don’t be silly.
Me: I bet I could speak Italian if you shared it with me.
Nell: Good try.
Me: No, seriously. Let me collect the Tupperware tomorrow.
Nell: Absolutely not.
Me: Imagine if food could do that.
Nell: Do what?
Me: Help you speak the language.
Nell: You’re getting carried away again.
Me: I bet that rook can speak Italian.
Nell: What rook?
Me: The one who waits behind the Bus Stop for Stanley.
Nell: I’ve never seen him.
Me: I don’t think we’re supposed to see him.
Nell: So how did you see him?
Me: I was writing by the window and saw Harriet go to the Bus Stop and take a secret photo of Stanley and the rook on her iBone.
Nell: You saw Harriet?
Me: Yes. I know she likes taking secret photos. I think it might be a spy thing.
Nell: You have far too vivid an imagination for your own good. Secret photos. What nonsense.
Me: Sorry.
