Nell: Have you seen The Growl on Sunday?
Me: Not yet. Why?
Nell: Look at the front page.
Me: It’s Harriet in a pink fluffy crown.
Nell: Yes. The crown’s a little vulgar but that’s The Growl for you.
Me: Why is she wearing it?
Nell: Harriet’s been chosen by the public as Our Devon Darling.
Me: That’s wonderful news.
Nell: It certainly is.
Me: Stephen Seagull must be spitting feathers.
Nell: That’s not something I need to see.
Me: It means angry. He’s definitely not going to be pleased about this. The cats must have come up trumps.
Nell: What are you talking about?
Me: The cats. They must have voted for her. I knew they wouldn’t choose a seagull.
Nell: Anyway, enough about cats and seagulls, today is all about Harriet.
Me: Yes.
Nell: The actual crowning will take place at Sunday Songs.
Me: Hasn’t she already been crowned?
Nell: No, that’s just photoshopping. Do keep up. The real crowning is happening here.
Me: Do we have a crown?
Nell: The Cat has a choice of tiaras and a velvet cloak in its Dressing Up Box.
Me: Will it be prepared to share?
Nell: Of course. The Cat is magnanimous in defeat. Besides, it loves a party.
Me: Are we having a celebratory Sunday roast?
Nell: Timothy is on an artists retreat, so Herr Hoffmann is cooking a Turkey Crown with all the trimmings.
Me: Will there be pigs in blankets?
Nell: I’ve no idea what the pigs are wearing. I didn’t even know they were invited.
Me: I meant sausages wrapped in bacon.
Nell: Why didn’t you say so? We’re having all the trimmings including cranberry sauce.
Me: It’s Canadian Thanksgiving tomorrow so you could say we’re celebrating early.
Nell: We’re celebrating Harriet.
Me: Of course. Sorry.
