Me: Why have you and Dave got such serious faces?
Nell: You’re looking at houses again, aren’t you?
Me: Kev and I are seeing one today and one tomorrow.
Nell: We should be going with you.
Me: You can’t turn up to a house viewing with three large dogs.
Nell: It’s one large dog and two medium sized dogs.
Me: It’s actually one giant dog and two large ones.
Nell: Potato potahto.
Me: You always say that when I’m right.
Nell: Take Henry and Horst in your hat. They can report back.
Me: I’m not wearing a hat.
Nell: It’s cold and rainy. A hat must be worn.
Me: I wouldn’t wear it inside anyway.
Nell: Wear an Alice band then.
Me: I’ve never worn an Alice band in my life.
Nell: I suppose Owl Pacino could sit on your shoulder.
Me: If you think I’m walking around a house with an owl on my shoulder you’re much mistaken.
Nell: I could lend you my handbag but Gladys isn’t to be trusted. She might leap out and start performing an interpretive dance.
Me: I’m not taking any animals, birds or insects. I’m perfectly capable of reporting back myself.
Nell: Are you really?
Me: What does that mean?
Nell: Somebody ate Kev’s ice cream while he was out at karate class yesterday evening.
Me: Did they?
Nell: And it wasn’t David.
Me: How do you know?
Nell: It wasn’t any of us dogs.
Me: Why are you so sure?
Nell: It was Belgian chocolate ice cream and even David knows not to eat chocolate.
Me: Okay, I confess. It was me.
Nell: Ha! I knew it.
Me: The urge came upon me and I couldn’t resist it.
Nell: You were prepared to let an innocent animal take the blame.
Me: Sorry.
