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Time to Come Home Now

Me: The sunsets are so magical here and look at the sky this morning.

Nell: Who is that young animal, please?

Me: Dave’s giving you the side eye. Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: Never mind David. Who is that terrier?

Me: Her name’s Daisy and she’s here with Vicky, one of the writers.

Nell: At the Cottage Hotel?

Me: Dogs are allowed to stay in certain rooms.

Nell: I know. I’ve stayed there myself. It’s in your book. Remember?

Me: I think you’d like Daisy. She’s a bit like you. Well spoken and obsessed with men.

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: I’m always being told off but you listen to Kev.

Nell: You just need more guidance than Kev does.

Me: Why is Dave looking at you like that?

Nell: He doesn’t want to go to Sunday Songs.

Me: Is he feeling unwell?

Nell: No, he wants to wait for you and work on his Yorkshire puddings. He can’t seem to get them quite right.

Me: Couldn’t he work on them after Sunday Songs?

Nell: Exactly what I said.

Me: I hope working on them doesn’t only mean eating.

Nell: There’s an element of cooking involved, but eating is a major part.

Me: How many has he had?

Nell: Don’t ask.

Me: Does that mean there will be a Sunday roast when I get home?

Nell: Absolutely. Poppy would expect nothing less.

Me: How is she?

Nell: A little exasperated. Life as a Guardian is somewhat quieter than she would choose.

Me: I miss her so much.

Nell: We all do and we’ve missed you too, so get that case packed.

Me: Are you coming to collect me?

Nell: What a ridiculous question. Of course I am. The writers will be wanting to meet me.

Me: Yes. Sorry.

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