Me: Look at my darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy. He’s completely irresistible.
Nell: I’m afraid he’s finding fresh rolls every morning irresistible too.
Me: We all are.
Nell: Do you know Herr Hoffmann is even feeding the Beefies?
Me: Seriously?
Nell: I’m surprised you haven’t heard them calling for him.
Me: I thought it was just their general hullabaloo.
Nell: No, it’s all ‘Come out Bear Hoffmann!’
Me: Who?
Nell: That’s what they call him.
Me: I rather like Bear Hoffmann.
Nell: Well, yes we all do.
Me: No, I mean the name. It suits him.
Nell: Anyway, they line up and call him and he gives them the leftover rolls.
Me: I’m surprised there are any left with Dave around.
Nell: He says they’re the broken ones.
Me: I suppose he’s right. The Beefies are a bit broken if you think about it. Maybe showing them a little kindness is the way to go.
Nell: I’m talking about broken rolls, not Beefies.
Me: They told us he was with Sir Roger Blubbery and it wasn’t a lie.
Nell: True.
Me: So sharing a few rolls with them seems fair enough to me.
Nell: Perhaps.
Me: You never know the Beefies might just turn over a new leaf.
Nell: They’re going to struggle with that. It’s autumn. All the leaves are dying.
Me: You know what I mean.
Nell: He has a name for them too, by the way.
Me: Who?
Nell: The Beefies. He calls them his ‘little seagirls.’
Me: But most of them are boys.
Nell: I know. He must have misheard it.
Me: I might start calling them that myself.
Nell: I wouldn’t if I were you.
Me: Stephen Seagirl isn’t going to like it, is he? See what I did there?
Nell: Just stop.
Me: Sorry.
