Meet Bumper

Me: You’re not going to believe this.

Nell: I was going to say the same to you.

Me: There’s a handsome chocolate Labrador in the field.

Nell: I know.

Me: I’m not talking about Harriet. He’s a boy and he’s clearing up after the llamas.

Nell: I know.

Me: You do?

Nell: Yes. His name is Bumper. He’s from Hudson, Wisconsin in the US and he’s Harriet’s pen pal.

Me: Pen pal?

Nell: Well, Zoom Buddy or whatever they call it nowadays. What’s wrong with good old fashioned pen and paper? In my day we would write letters.

Me: You’re only 11.

Nell: And your point is?

Me: Harriet never said she had a pen pal.

Nell: No, and she never told us she’d invited him to stay either.

Me: He’s ever so good at tidying, Nell.. Look at the field now. You wouldn’t know Gladys and the llamas had been gliding all over it. No banana skins at all.

Nell: I wish they’d stop eating those awful things.

Me: Llamas can’t resist a banana. It’s a well known fact.

Nell: Harriet says Bumper is quite the people sort of dog and ever so popular in his neighbourhood.

Me: That’s nice. I shall enjoy having a chat with him.

Nell: I beg your pardon?

Me: I thought I would go and welcome him.

Nell: That’s fine, but conversations are with me.

Me: Not all conversations, Nell. I’m allowed to talk to other dogs.

Nell: What is he doing?

Me: Who?

Nell: Bumper. He’s got Beaumarchais in his mouth and he’s dragging him across the field..

Me: I don’t think that’s wise. He’s a tiger. He won’t like that at all.

Nell: I’m talking about Beaumarchais the stuffed tiger not Beauregard the real one. Do keep up.

Me: Oh yes. Sorry.

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