There’s Something Wrong With Dave

Me: There’s something wrong with Dave.

Nell: He was fine at breakfast.

Me: I think he might have a dark side.

Nell: Don’t be ridiculous.

Me: He’s wrapped himself in a blanket and he’s looking at me in a sinister way.

Nell: Sinister? David?

Me: I know. Do you think he’s been hypnotised?

Nell: When?

Me: The Beefies flew over earlier shouting something.

Nell: They always do.

Me: What did he have for breakfast?

Nell: The usual. A couple of lightly boiled eggs with hot buttered soldiers on the side and a bowl of tea.

Me: No eating by mistake?

Nell: He cleared the table before everyone had finished but most of us know that’s going to happen so we eat faster.

Me: That must make breakfast a little tense.

Nell: It’s actually quite exciting.

Me: I think he might have eaten something that’s disagreed with him. He’s not himself at all.

Nell: In what way?

Me: He looks like he might pounce.

Nell: Would you say he has more bite to him?

Me: I never mentioned biting. Dave would never bite me. Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: But does he look like he might?

Me: A bit.

Nell: Bravo. Well done David. He’s passed this test with flying colours.

Me: What test?

Nell: Snoopy and Lucy were worried that David was too nice to be Indiana Bones. Indy has a ruthless side and he needed to find it.

Me: Oh, I see.

Nell: I said if he could convince you he could convince anyone.

Me: Well, he did.

Nell: Excellent. We’ve finally found our Indy. I’ll give Snoopy and Lucy the good news.

Me: Does that mean Dave can be himself again?

Nell: Let him stay in character a little longer.

Me: I need my boy back. Sorry.

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