This Cannot Be True

Me: What’s the matter with you and Harriet?

Nell: David and Poppy just told us something rather upsetting.

Me: No. I absolutely refuse to believe they have anything to do with A Friend. Whatever Miss Maple and the Dachshund Boys say they are wrong.

Nell: Miss Maple isn’t saying anything of the kind. She knows David and Poppy are innocent.

Me: Thank goodness for that.

Nell: But someone else isn’t.

Me: It’s that lion. I kept telling you not to trust him but you wouldn’t listen.

Nell: Lionel King has nothing to do with it either.

Me: How can you be so sure?

Nell: Because on Saturday night David and Poppy saw someone move the Stuffed Tiger and Johnny Rabbit.

Me: Who was it?

Nell: They don’t know how to tell you.

Me: Why?

Nell: It was Kev.

Me: Our Kev?

Nell: Yes, and when he saw them he winked and put his finger to his lips.

Me: Are you trying to tell me that Kev is A Friend?

Nell: It looks like he might be.

Me: But why would he do that? Are they absolutely certain?

Nell: They’re positive. They didn’t want to say anything but Miss Maple got it out of them.

Me: Did she use bacon?

Nell: I believe bacon sandwiches were involved. David caved in first.

Me: Darling Big Brave Beautiful Boy.

Nell: And Miss Maple tricked Poppy into telling her by accusing David of lying.

Me: I can’t believe it.

Nell: Nobody can.

Me: Does Sally know?

Nell: Yes. She didn’t seem surprised, so we think David might have told her last night.

Me: I need to talk to Kev right now.

Nell: I’m afraid he’s in a meeting with Sally and can’t be disturbed.

Me: I don’t care. I’m not waiting any longer. Sorry.

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