Nell: I’d like a word with you, please.
Me: I don’t think anyone could look more adorable than you with a tennis ball in your mouth.
Nell: Never mind that I need to talk to you.
Me: Doesn’t it makes you want to cough?
Nell: No. Now, do you remember that I told you to take it easy?
Me: Yes. Talking of taking it easy, Nell, could you ask Harriet and Poppy not to keep quite such a close eye on me at night?
Me: I woke up sandwiched between them like a piece of bacon.
Nell: Why bring bacon into this?
Me: I couldn’t move.
Nell: Anyway, I turned on the television yesterday lunchtime and what did I see?
Me: It could be anything. ‘Escape to the Country’?
Nell: No. You.
Me: Ah, yes well I can explain that.
Nell: Sitting at your desk with your laptop talking about a BBC television series called ‘Shetland’.
Me: Only briefly.
Nell: Your laptop is supposed to be there for writing. Quietly. Not broadcasting on the BBC.
Me: So, here’s the thing. BBC Points of View emailed me a while ago about recording something for them about the ‘Shetland’ finale.
Me: I’m not entirely sure but it was as the writer of ‘Conversations with Nell’.
Nell: You never told me.
Me: No, it was all around the time when I heard about the cancer.
Nell: I see.
Me: I forgot about it but then they contacted me again asking really nicely so I sent them a short video never expecting it to be broadcast.
Nell: But it was.
Me: Yes. You were probably rather surprised to see me.
Nell: Could you let me know the next time you decide to be on the BBC, please?
Me: Yes. Sorry.